My Purpose

I am 38 years old and it surprises me that I have just found my purpose in life. To think that fresh out of high school I wanted to be an English teacher just like Ms. M. She was my favorite high school teacher that inspired me to pursue that dream. Sadly, I never accomplished that dream. I did however, enroll in the University of Kentucky as an English major, but later flunked out. I then went on to Eastern Kentucky University to major in Interior Design.  Again, I didn't finish. Although this time I didn't flunk out, I was married and became pregnant with my beautiful daughter Kira.  After that, life happened. After 5years of marriage and two children, I got divorced. I was working and taking care of an ailing mother.

Eventually, I went back to school at Sullivan University-Louisville,Ky.( Yes, I drove back and forth 3-4days a week for 18months). At Sullivan I majored in Baking and Pastry Arts and I FINISHED Cum Laude! I was 31years old. I tried for awhile to bake from home with my little business I called, Sweet As Me Creations. But baking/cake decorating takes up a lot of time that I didn't have as a single mother. So now I have this education and over $26,000 in student loans and I worked in a factory for a total of 15years! Sounds depressing huh? Try living it! I somewhat failed at school, a failed 5year marriage, a failed 9year relationship and I was a factory worker.

Fast forward to now. I am published poet ( Accents-Publishing, Lexington Poetry Month). I graduated college as professional baker, PROUD single mother of two beautiful children. I have successfully kept my weight off for 3years! I am a licensed Zumba instructor. I have been seizure free for 1 year 7 months! and work for Fayette County Public schools. Wow! Talk about winning!

As part of my growth and healing, I started sending each morning affirmations/inspirational text to my family and friends. A few days ago I sent this message:

"Everything that you are going through is preparing you for what you asked for."~unknown

Hmm...how fitting. I had these dreams of doing great things for and with my life,being a teacher, pastry chef, and wife. All in which, in my eyes then I failed at.  As I have grown and healed a lot of things within myself I have come to realize I have not failed at all.  All those events in my past life have prepared me for the life I am moving toward.  I did become a teacher, not only to my children but to the children on my bus. By teaching them about life and guiding them in the right direction. I teach Zumba fitness 3days a weeks. I am a teacher/inspiration that even though you have health issues and life throws you body blows you can stumble, and you will fall, but GET UP! The fight ain't over until the higher power says it's over!  I may not be the best writer and pretty sure my grammar and punctuation is not always correct, but I have managed to write and publish my poetry with Accent publishing blog of Lexington Poetry Month. With my professional baking diploma I can help others and teach them how to bake healthy sweet treats.  At first, to me these were just simply mundane accomplishments, but in reality they are pretty dog-on good accomplishments.  I have had to learn to stop looking at my accomplishments in life as if no one cares and it's nothing to write home about.  If I don't care why would any one else? I have done a lot with the hand that has been dealt. I didn't give up! I kept pressing forward and that speaks volumes if I have to say so myself-and I do!

Consequently, everything that I "believed" I had failed at wasn't a failure at all. It was all in preparation for becoming the woman I am today. A woman who thinks more highly of herself and is understanding she deserves everything she has dreamed and asked for. God said." You have not because you ask not." and the Universe is steadily waiting for me to come grab what is rightfully mine.

I will end this with a conversation I had with my spiritual father. A spiritual father is a man whom is close you like your biological father, you speak with and guides you in your spiritual life. While speaking to my spiritual father one day, he began telling me how proud he was of me, watching me grow from this wounded little girl to this "powerhouse" woman standing before him.(Best words my ears,heart and spirit have ever heard!). I looked at him proudly and said,"Baba, I have finally found my purpose. It took me 38years to find it, but I found it! Health & Fitness brings me so much joy. It isn't work for me, I enjoy it." As he smiled at me he said,

" Listen Shuntella, we are all on this planet searching for our purpose. You have been blessed to find yours. Many leave this earth still searching. Keep walking in your purpose and let God and the ancestors guide you where you need to go and you can't go wrong. You can't go wrong. It's all upward for you now."